Discipline by Haircut
So, you wanna act grown...well, now you can look grown too." was what Russell Frederick posted on the Facebook page for his A-1 Kutz barbershop in Snellville, Georgia. Frederick offered the "Benjamin Button style" haircut at no charge. You may remember that Benjamin Button was the main character in a movie about reverse aging that starred Brad Pitt.
The mother of a ten year old boy took Fredrick up on his offer. The "after" photos show a boy who looks like a little old man with a pronounced bald spot. It's toted as a cure for misbehaving boys, a little bit of shame to get him back on track. In this particular case it worked. The ten year old decided he didn't need that kind of trouble again.
While A-1 Kutz offers the cut for free, it usually doesn't come to that. One look at the picture of the first recipient of the "old man" cut is enough to do the trick. That's what I like about it. Just the prospect of the embarrassment of the haircut is enough to bring about a change in behavior. Many punishments diminish in effectiveness with each use. This story received a lot of attention at a time when parents are at a loss as to how to discipline their children. Spankings are out,so the haicut is definitely an improvemnet over them. The hair grows back in a few weeks. Some have criticized the technique as publicizing something that should be private. So, what is appropriate and effective discipline?
Discipline, at it's core, is training. We want to train our children to become successful, law abiding adults who make a positive contribution to society. To accomplish this there are some things that are always in order and effective.
I think the first thing we need to do is give our children a good example. It is not necessary to say anything. Just model the behavior you want to see in your child. The next thing I think we need to
do is to help our children build a positive self image. We praise the good that they do. We discourage what is not good. It is ok to criticize the act, but never, never criticize the child. Another technique is to focus on how an inappropriate act makes you feel. "I feel very embarassed when your grades suffer from lack of effort." One more very important thing is, when you have to correct behavior, always end on a positive note. "I know that with some extra attention to your school work, you can bring up those grades.
For most of us parenting a child is the most significant thing we will do. It behooves us to take the time to do a good job.
What do you think?
